Atticus & Parenting...sometimes a tough combination

I thought I'd do a quick update on Atticus. This is not the usual happy update, but I think since this is my blog and I like to look back on all the memories, that it is ok to be honest. And, I like to see progress, so hopefully soon,

Atticus is almost 5!! And I don't know if 4, almost 5 year olds, can be as up and down to parent as Atticus has been these last 4 or 5 months, but it's not been easy. The thing is that he is such a good kid. He has the sweetest heart and doesn't think twice about being helpful to me if he sees a need. This has been great in these last few weeks of pregnancy when I don't bend well or do things as fast. He is quick to tell me he will do something "because you can't since you have the baby in your tummy". And that's ok with me. He is quick to want to help Grace do something when she needs help and asks me for it. He will jump in and just do things for her. Sometimes this is great and sometimes, I think this is spoiling her! But, I love that he wants to help. He knows right from wrong and we talk a lot about "thinking about it" so he will think before he acts or speaks sometimes. And when he is really trying hard, he will stop something he is doing and be so proud to tell me "I thought about it!" right before he might have made a wrong decision. Also, if he is in that trying hard mood, he will truly do everything kindly and right and not get upset for no reason. And while I do not expect perfection from him, I do want him to try. I know he is going to mess up, make mistakes, have bad moods, etc. And it is not easy to be the Big Brother who has to be a good example and cannot go back to acting like a 3 year old in situations where Grace might get away with something. I think that is the hardest part for me sometimes because I expect more out of him because he is older and has already learned how to behave in situations, but sometimes I am impatient and compare too quickly. And that is not always fair or easy for him or I to understand.

I think he thrives best on one-on-one attention and will ask for "Mommy Atticus time". But, mostly, we can't do that much during the day. I am going to try to make more time for that special time. I love it because he is so smart and funny and I love to be with him, but part of having siblings and family is that one-on-one time is not always readily available. And, sometimes I think he just has to learn that is part of life and sometimes, I think that I need to really work hard to give it to him as much as I can because one day he won't want "Mommy Atticus time". And honestly, once he's had some special time, he generally behaves better overall.

So, the part that is tough right now is that he gets so upset so quickly. If told no to something, he will throw himself on his knees or immediately whine and complain. And sometimes, it is something that is not a big deal. It's just a normal, "no, we are not going to do that right now". If he only did this with major things, I might understand his frustration more. But, it's with the smallest stuff that tomorrow he might not get upset about at all. And he gets this horrible glare on his face that just hurts my feelings, to be honest. And of course, as most toddlers/almost 5 year olds, he is relentless. So, saying no once doesn't always work. So, then we have to go to time out or eventually a spanking. And as a parent, I have to determine what is truly deserving of a spanking, because I want that to be the ultimate punishment. I have to figure out what to ignore and move on with and what to focus on. Ugh. I think when you are with them on your own 10 hours a day, it is different than if they are in school or doing other things for a few of those hours. There are days I feel like I am on him with everything he does. That doesn't help either of us have a good day. I don't mind the hard days and seeing progress, but goodness I hate to see him be miserable. I don't want him to think he can't do anything right or that I am just mad all day at him. I am not, but I am trying to figure out that balance. So, the rough days are rough, but the great days tend to be great! So, I know it's a phase and part of growing up, but as much as I am not a "worrier", I do get concerned about those daily decisions I make and how they are affecting him. I feel like he is my guinea pig sometimes, being the first child. And I don't know if that is ok or not!

Also, the only other thing I have to be frustrated with is that I cannot tell if he is listening or me or ignoring me. He is not a naturally disrespectful kid who wants to be a toot. I see those kids in his class or at the park; it's not that they are bad but I can tell some of them are just toots and could care less about pleasing anyone or hurting anyone's feelings. And thankfully, that is not Atticus. But, also in the last few months, I feel like he hears me less. I cannot decide if he just gets pre-occupied in his own mind or hears my voice so much all day, every day, that he tunes me out without really meaning to. And I might tell him "go get your shoes" 3 times in a row so quickly that he doesn't have enough time to do it before I am frustrated that he still hasn't done it. And that leads to seeming like he is being disobedient but maybe he's not really meaning to. And sometimes, I think he is actually ignoring me, but I can't tell. I try to ask him to repeat what I say or focus on me, but this is where I actually think he doesn't pay attention and hear the words I'm saying, because sometimes he has no idea what I just said and can't repeat it to me. So, clearly he wasn't listening. But, why? I'm not sure. And other times, we have just the opposite. He is focused. So, this is where I struggle because I expect immediate response or action or even when I'm being super extra duper patient, I still slowly lose it when over and over and over I feel like I'm being ignored. So, some of this is on me because I need to be calmer and more patient and figure out how to react better.

So, parenting is hard. Everyone says it is. And I am such a go with the flow person, that I think things will work out. But, also, I am with him more than anyone else and essentially am his biggest influence in terms of "number of hours spent with him" although of course he has Vic who is such a wonderful influence, thank goodness. So, I want to be consistent with parenting, even though that is hard too because I am just trying to figure it out and every kid is different! And, I am not perfect either so I have bad days and moments when I react the wrong way. So, it's hard to be a great example in those moments.

On the other hand, I want to say that he is the sweetest. I don't know another word for it. We talk about "thinking of others before ourself" lately because he's also in that "all about me" phase. He just thinks of himself first - totally natural for this age. He is becoming his own little person with his own opinions and it is easy to first think of yourself when you are doing that. But, in the evenings, he is so sweet when we are getting ready for bed and getting them to sleep and taking care of Grace by crawling into bed with her at night. And, if he thinks he is helping you or being an important part of something, he is just sweet and thoughtful. That's why I am so glad he is a big brother to Grace. She is so lucky because he loves her. So. Much. Even when she is a toot and doesn't want to play with him (she is such an independent player), he still loves her. His feelings get hurt, but he will try to find ways to play with her by telling her he will play "her way" or finding a toy to offer her to add to her playing.

I also think he is such a perfectionist in some ways and that makes things harder for him. He doesn't always want to try something new unless he knows he can be good at it. And he tells me all the time that he doesn't have as good of an imagination as Grace so he needs me to tell him new ways to play with his toys or he just needs me to play with him. Of course, if I can sneak to play with just him and Grace catches us, then she wants to play. And we should include her, but he gets mad because he wants the one-on-one time (that he might have gotten 5 minutes of before Grace joined). And then we have to talk about sharing and not being ugly and then he gets mad and then they fight and you can see how these situations get. Then, the next thing you know, he is in trouble because he is not making the right decisions. And from his point of view, I can see how that is really hard to understand.

It won't get easier with a new baby, as far as time, but I'm hoping I can show him how important his role will be with a new baby as well. I want him to know that he is so important and loved. And there are definitely days where I hope he does know that, even though he and I have not had the best day together.

Oh and there are days I see progress! Church is a constant work in progress for us. He is comfortable there and while that is good, it is easy for him to not realize that this is Church. We have to be respectful of God's house and not run around like we would at the park. And in general, church is public and we are always working on behaving in public the right way. So, at church this past Easter Sunday, we attended the early service which does not have Kingdom Time. Kingdom Time is where he usually goes for about 30-40 minutes for a snack and lesson. But, they only do it at the late service. So, while Grace was in the nursery, he was having to sit and color and read his book for the entire time. And sitting quietly and still for an hour and 15 minutes is not easy for anyone. But, he did great! On his own, he would stand during songs and prayer (although I'm perfectly fine with him sitting down to just look at his book or color). He would look up at me as if to say "i'm trying to be grown up" and I was so proud. And he would constantly take my hand or lean over to hug me. He really reacts to praise of "I'm proud of you" and it makes him so happy that he tries harder. So, he was being so sweet and I was truly proud that he was thinking about how to act in the service and working hard to do a good job.


Oh my little Atticus. I love you so much and I know these little daily things are nothing compared to what some families face. And we will get through it and both be better!!!

Side note: I am reading this book called "Raising Boys" by James Dobson. And I can't wait to have time to read it all. It is so good and James Dobson and I think alike. And it has lots of reasons that the things above are so normal for boys. I've just gotten into that chapter. I'm ready for him to tell me how to "raise them" now that he is telling me some of these things are not uncommon....

Okay until next time!

Helping Daddy around the house

Atticus absolutely loves to help Vic do work around the house and outside. Anything that has to do with tools or lawn equipment, Atticus wants to help him. And, of course, Vic makes everything fun and always includes him in the projects. So, this particular night was no exception. Vic decided to hang my large window picture frames that I recently bought at Canton. It was a big project because Vic has to have everything exactly measured out and centered and then put this ginormous things on the wall. So, it included some plans, some tools, and Atticus to help. Here are some pictures below.

Atticus' Bible Study

In an effort to spend more time studying the Bible, I have been trying to read Jesus Calling daily. My Bible and Jesus Calling book sits out on the table or on the window seat. A few day ago, I didn't make Atticus nap and told him he could help me clean house and play. At one point, as I was sitting at the computer (probably checking email or people.com - sometimes Mama needs a break!), Atticus comes over to me and picks up the Jesus Calling and...

Atticus: "I need to do my Bible Study."
Me: "You do?" I didn't bother to explain he didn't have the real Bible.
Atticus: "What is a Bible Study?"
Me: "Well, we have to read our Bibles and study what God is telling us. It's a time to just talk to God and listen to God."
Atticus: "Can I take your Bible to the couch to do my Bible study?"
Me: "Of course, Atticus."
He gets on the couch and starts looking at the pages as if he is trying to read the book. Being the crazy mom that I am, I quickly grab my camera to snap a picture hoping he doesn't see. He doesn't! I go back to the computer while giving him his space and I hear:

"Be a good boy. I want to be a good boy." At this moment, I realize he is repeating what we say when we pray lately, which is "God, help Atticus to be a good boy." I'm melting inside. Watching this sweet little boy do his "Bible Study" is the most encouraging thing.

It lasts maybe 4 minutes, and he comes to me and says "Lets do our Bible Studies together." At this point, I show him the Bible and do a very short Bible story with him. Then, I tell him to go find a book about God and he brings me his Noah's Ark book that we read together. Then, we pray and we are done.

I cannot explain how wonderful this little event was. It's just so powerful to see God working in our little children. It is also a good reminder that he is watching what Vic and I do and say all the time. We know this because we constantly notice him repeating phrases we say, but who would have known he would have noticed this or heard me say it once or twice? I don't do my Bible Study in front of the kids, because I need peace and quiet. But, he has noticed. And, last night after a church function, when we prayed at dinnertime we included, "thank you for our church family." Today, as I put him down for a nap, I told him we had some people from our church coming over tonight and he immediately said "what will we do with our church family?". He remembers everything. It's just another reminder of how hard parenting is. While we are not perfect, we are helping mold the minds and hearts of little people around us and have to keep showing them how God wants us to act, even when we do not want to act the right way. We have to give them the strongest foundations so they are instinctive with their kindness, thoughtfulness, patience, and love when they leave our little homes to go out into the world on their own. And by on their own, I mean preschool or kindergarten or to a friends house. I must, must, must keep striving to serve the Lord better so that Atticus and Grace will follow suit.

And, while doing that, I will do Bible Studies with Atticus anytime he asks.

We are potty trained!

***warning: lots of "poop" and "tee-tee" talk in this post....it's just our life these days.

So, for Atticus, the 3rd time was the charm. If you remember, we attempted potty training last June and then again sometime in October/November, but it just didn't take. He wouldn't tell me when he would need to potty and then we would just have accidents. While I didn't mind an accident, I decided if he wasn't going to even tell me, there was no point in pushing it over and over. Everyone I talked to told me little boys take longer; they told me that many little boys don't even start training until 3; and they told me that when they were ready, they would just use the potty with no problem. Well, it turns out that those items fit Atticus. I am so proud of him though. He started about 2 months ago and hasn't looked back.

A week after we got back from our craft room renovation weekend, I decided to just put him on the potty to see how that particular Monday would go. I pulled out the Toy Story and Mickey Mouse underwear, his mini potty that fits on the big potty and started talking up potty treats. On the first day, he tee-teed with no accidents! The second day, he did it again! We were so proud. He would tell me he needed to potty and would sit on the potty and go with no problem. The one thing we were concentrating on those two days was also pooping in the potty. He refused. I think he just didn't really know how, but it was not until late Tuesday night that he finally pooped on the potty. We were thrilled and he was too. Even that next day, I started to put a diaper on him to go for a playdate and he told me he wanted underwear. So, that is what he wore. We went to the children's museum and while he didn't make it completely to the bathroom before a teeny tiny accident, that has been the ONLY time we have been out that we have had any kind of accident. He always tells me when he needs to go and if we are driving or somewhere whose potty I don't want to use, I ask him to hold it and he does. Now, he has learned to tee-tee outside and loves to do that at the park. It's not quite as clean, but it does the trick when we don't have access to a potty. Sometime, he prefers that in the backyard as well. But, he has really done a great job. We don't really do potty treats anymore and though we have had accidents at home when he just gets too busy outside playing to tell me he needs to go, they are not normal. We also put him in a diaper at night. I would say 70% of the time he is dry when we change him out of his diaper that next morning. And he may always be dry but sometimes we are just slow to put him in his underwear.

We are just so very proud of him! And I find it so funny that is was very true that when he was ready, that is when potty training finally clicked. So, sometimes there is not a right or wrong way to do something like potty train. We just learn as we go!

While Atticus has learned lots of things about potty parts and potty habits and things we only talk about and do on the potty, we have had a few funny conversations. During the first two days, here were a couple:

Mommy/Daddy (over and over while trying to teach him to poop): "Atticus, you have to focus" (and we would point to our heads. So every time he used the restroom after that for a week or so, he would get a serious look on his face, point to his head, and say "Mommy, Focus". or "Daddy, Focus". We would also tell him we were serious about him using the potty. At one point, he said "I am serious. I need my diaper!"

We are always trying to come up with reasons for why we do certain things, but in one instance on that first day, Atticus beat us to the punch: Atticus: "Mickey will be sad if I poop in my underwear (as he wore his Mickey underwear)."

And the second night of not yet pooping, Atticus was in the bathtub. He was holding his hand on his bottom and looking uncomfortable when Vic asked him, "Atticus, what are you holding?" Atticus replied, "I have to keep my poop safe." Keep it safe? What in the world?

These days, he doesn't have as much to talk about because he just goes to the bathroom and does his thing. He does, occasionally tell us that he needs his privacy so that we will leave him alone. And honestly, that is the best way to get him to go - just leave him alone for a few minutes. He also needs his magazines to read sometimes while sitting on the potty. Typically, they are magazines with either animals or toys in them. He will also make it clear to me that it is ok to toot in his underwear but not poop in it. He also is very excited when he poops and has to point it out to us in the potty. Gross, I know. Boys.

Also, "poop" is the answer he gives me sometimes when I ask him something. "Atticus, what color is this?" "Poop color". "Atticus, what do you want for a snack?" "Poop". "Atticus, what shirt do you want to wear?" "Poop." It's so strange. I mean, he doesn't pick this stuff up from Vic and I because we don't talk like that. He isn't in school, nor do his little friends talk that way when we play. But, he has learned that poop is not appropriate to talk about, so I guess that is why he thinks it is hilarious to answer with "Poop" when we ask him something. Seriously, I hope this is just a little boy thing. I can't imagine my sweet little Grace giving me those answers. Oh and to top it off, one day at Sunday School in the opening which has all the teachers and kids together, everyone had to say something they were thankful for. I was curious what Atticus would say because we talk about what we are thankful for all the time. His turn comes up and what does he say? "Poop." Then he looks at me and grins. What a stinker! #punintended

So, these are the days of potty training. And, this 3rd time has been so much better. I love not having to change his diapers anymore. They were disgusting. I love that he goes to the potty and washes his hands and is so proud to do those things. I'm really hoping that I do not jinx myself by writing this post, but seriously, this is a big feat and we are so happy!

 

Atticus' Sleeping Habits

Around November/December, Atticus started coming to our room in the morning about 6:00 or so and laying on the ground, with his blanket, to fall asleep again. It was funny because he knows he should stay in his bed and cannot sleep with us. But, one morning he came and we actually found him outside our room on the floor of the kitchen with his blanket. Then, a couple mornings later, he was on the floor of our room next to Vic's side. Vic started putting a pillow down there for him to lay on. Every morning he would do this and when he woke up around 7:00 or 7:30, he would see us and be up for the day. Well, after Christmas, he started coming to our room and patiently waited until we put him in bed between us. This was still around the same time of the morning, but didn't happen every morning. Then, it progressed to coming to my side to get into bed with us. Then, it progressed to him just climbing over me while I was sleeping and putting himself in between us under the covers. Well, it was adorable and cute and he was snuggly and would typically go right back to sleep. And since it was around 5:30 or 6:00 in the morning, it wasn't worth it to me and Vic to take him back to his room and put him back to bed and deal with an upset little boy who might wake his sister. Then, for a week or so, he started coming about 1:30 in the morning. One night, he was crying so I just stuck him between us and quickly realized that would never work. He just moved around and stuck his feet in our backs so 20 minutes later we were headed back to his bed. We had to fall asleep with him a couple of times to avoid too many tears. But, after that, when it happened in the middle of the night, we just took him back and put him down and he would go back to sleep. Fortunately, that middle of the night stuff stopped and he is back to coming to our room around 6:30 or so to climb into bed. Now, though, as we continue to sleep (well as I continue to sleep - Vic is typically already at the gym), he will either sleep or just lay there and sing softly to himself or talk to himself in a whisper until I wake up. Sometimes I am awake but love listening to him. He is so sweet to not want to wake us and so sweet to just snuggle up with us. I have never been one to want my kids to sleep with me. I want them in their beds and us in our bed. And one day soon I'm sure we will have to nip this  morning routine in the bud, but for now I love it. I get my good night of sleep and I get to wake up to a sweet little boy who is happy and ready for the day. The only drawback is that when I want to wake up early in the morning to exercise or to just be productive before kids wake up, I am not successful. Atticus won't crawl into my bed because I'm already awake, but I also get zero time to myself to get things done. Oh well - I don't really like waking up early anyways, so I just enjoy this instead!

Little Moments: Eyes

So, this morning Atticus has been a toot. He throws his blanket on Grace; he jumps on the couch; he throws the pillows on the ground on top of Grace; he plays with his colored pencils sword fighting them (yes, he is sword fighting by himself) and gets wild almost hitting Grace. He bumps heads with her while being too wild after I told him to move away from her and it's the kind of bump that you can hear when their heads meet. I ask him to do something and he just looks at me and says no. It's just one of those mornings - he has already had a spanking and been warned too many times that he cannot go with Daddy to HEB if he doesn't behave. However, I really need him to go to HEB for awhile so I can re-gain some of my patience. On top of that, Grace has been sick, so if he looks at her wrong, she just starts crying. All in all, it's a normal terrible two kind of morning.

So, as he and Vic start to leave, with Vic knowing I need a few minutes of quiet, Vic dresses Atticus in his new adorable hat and says "tell Mommy bye and give her your cute eyes". Saying this, of course, he means to give me a cute look. But, first, Atticus squints his eyes and then walks to me and pretends to grab his eye and put it in mine. Then, he does the other eye very methodically as if he is trying to give me his eye. Laughing inside at how literal he is being, he then says "no mommy, those are Attis' eyes. Daddy - its not wukking". I just can't help but laugh at how serious he is being about giving me his eyes.

Then, they begin to walk out the door and Vic tells him to tell me bye. He says "Bye Mommy; Bye My Baby. I Yuv You Mommy. I Yuv my baby." And he looks adorable in his little hat while saying it.

Good grief - for all those frustrating moments, he can sure be endearing.

Potty Training Update

So sorry to leave you hanging on the saga of potty training Atticus. I'm sure you are expecting me to now post saying "hooray! We are done! He is potty trained!". But, I cannot do that. He is not potty trained. Friday, we took a break. The night before, Atticus woke up crying in the middle of the night. After not going back to sleep, I went to his room to check him and asked him if he needed to potty. He said yes and off we went (this was about 1:30 am). But, I found out he had already had an accident in his bed. So, we just put a diaper on for the rest of the night.

And, I decided I didn't want to stay in the house for a third day. So, we left the house for a day out and I put him in a diaper. Then, we were off and on Saturday and Sunday because I was preparing for a baby shower all weekend and Vic had the kids and Atticus was sometimes in underwear, but mostly in diapers. Then, Monday I kept him in a diaper. Monday night, my friend Meghan and I discussed potty training our sons (she is also in the  midst of this with Lane) and she re-inspired me to try some more. So, Tuesday, we went through 3 wet and one poopy diaper in a row without Atticus EVER even telling me he needed to go and I put him back in a diaper. I know - I'm a wimp. But, the poop was gross. And I was frustrated. Frustrated because eventually HE HAS TO TELL ME HE NEEDS TO POTTY! I can't spend every 20 minutes putting him on the potty all day long. I mean- I will if I thought that would help, but even when I do that, he has accidents between those 20 minutes. So, Wednesday and Thursday he was in diapers. Today he was in underwear and had an accident and then we had errands, so he went to a diaper and hasn't gone back to underwear yet (napping now). And then after he gets up from his nap, I want to walk to the park with him and Grace. So, do I put him in a diaper? Or do I put him in underwear? There is no place to use the restroom at the park so he would have to hold it, which is a lot to ask of him and he won't do anyways. And even if there was someplace for him to use the restroom, I think he would still have an accident and I'd have to change his clothes and deal with all of that at the park. So, most likely - diaper it will be.

You can see why this is not an easy task. So many people I have talked to have said "my son was three before he was potty trained" or "I started when he was three" or "when they are ready, it will be easy". Who knows what actually will work for Atticus? We will keep trying.

Potty Training Day 2

Day 2 has looked like this (and please keep in mind that this is still gross, but I am trying to look for patterns here and figuring out what is working when; so I apologize again for the gross bathroom references over and over and over):

6:30 - Even though I set my alarm to get up before him, he beat me and I found him in his usual spot, at our doorway, dozing on the floor. I woke him to find him very wet and we went to sit on the potty. He tee-teed some more. The good news is that his bed was not wet at all! So, he must have had the accident after he woke up. We got his hands washed and put on new underwear. Then, I headed out the door for a morning walk.
7:20 - While I was walking, Vic said he asked to go tee-tee and poop. So, they sat on the potty and he tee-teed. Yay! I'm assuming hands were washed.
8:00 - Breakfast and one juice box.
8:30 - Sat on potty and tee-teed. Washed hands.
9:15 - Had an accident; put him back on potty and he tee-teed and pooped! Washed hands. Got another potty treat. Another pair of underwear down.
11:40 - I put him on the potty and he tee-teed. Hands washed.
12:15 - I could tell he was trying to poop while we played. I rushed him to the potty to find he'd had a tee-tee accident and had partially pooped. Yuck. But, I sat him on the potty and he pooped again. He was very proud! Although he did fail in the area of telling me he needed to go to the potty. Sigh. Hands washed and potty treat.
1:00 - I put him on the potty before naptime and he tee-teed. Hands washed.
1:05 - As I put him back into bed for his nap, he assured me he needed to poop. I am pretty sure he was just looking for an excuse to not nap, but I took him anyways. Nothing happened. Hands washed. Back to bed.
1:20 - Asleep.
3:40 - He woke up, so I rushed into his room to get him to the potty. He was dry, but not really awake yet and just cried and cried and cried and wouldn't sit on the potty. I was so irritated with myself because I knew I just got to him too soon. But, he eventually calmed down and was still dry, but kept telling me he didn't need to potty. So, we went outside to play and it wasn't until 5:30 that I asked him and he finally said "yes" he needed to potty. Sure enough, he did. Hands washed and potty treat.

6:00 - I had to run out for a quick errand when Vic got home. I think Atticus went to the potty twice while I was gone, but listen to this! He told Vic both time when he needed to go. Now, why won't he do that with me? Atticus had a bath and then right before he went to bed, he had an accident. But, in bed about 9 and hoping for a good night!

Things I've realized today:

1. He doesn't always remember to ask for a potty treat which is good because maybe that will not be expected forever. But, for now when he does, he gets three chocolate covered raisins and if he poops, he gets a Peeps Ghost Marshmallow. I may need to go stock up on a few of those before Halloween ends. He loves them.
2. He is still not telling me he needs to potty. I don't think he cares that he is sitting in wet underwear.
3. He is very messy when sitting to tee-tee. But, this is step one. We tried standing yesterday, but he doesn't want to stand there for long. And since I currently have him on the big potty with the little lid, then he can't go anywhere without me helping him get down. If I can just get him to first tell me he needs to go potty, then we'll attempt the cheerio trick and peeing outside trick to teach him to tee-tee standing up.
4. And, finally I think I am realizing that this 3 day attempt was good, but I'm probably going to have to extend it for a few weeks.....

Potty Training Day 1

So, I'm getting serious. Time to potty train and get this done. I've dedicated today, tomorrow and Friday to a serious potty training time and then we will have the weekend to hopefully finish it up. I'm warning you that this post is kind of gross because it gives you the details of poop and tee-tee.

Day 1 has looked like this:

By the time I changed his diaper this morning, he was already wet and had pooped. I had planned to be awake before him so as soon as I saw him stirring, I could take him straight to the potty. But, Grace woke up at 12:30 and 5:30 and I was tired.

9:40 - I put him on the potty and he tee-teed. Put on underwear. Washed hands. Got potty treat. Already had a juice box at breakfast.
10:00 - Had an accident; put him back on potty and he tee-teed. Washed hands. Got another potty treat. But, one pair of underwear is down. Gave him a juice box.
10:16 - I put him on the potty for 15 minutes, read books, and he tee-teed. Washed hands. Got another potty treat.
11:05  - I put him on the potty and he tee-teed. More hand washing. And yes - another potty treat.
11:35 - I put him on the potty. Nothing happened. Washed hands.
12:10 - He started talking about pooping. I asked him if he needed to potty and he said yes! Got to the potty to find he had a tee-tee accident. We sat on potty for 20 minutes. No tee-tee. No poop. Another pair of underwear down. Washed hands. Had a slight meltdown when he didn't get a potty treat.
12:45 - Ate lunch. Gave him another juice box.
1:30 - Put him on the potty and he tee-teed. Took us 15 minutes while we read books. Washed hands.
2:05 - Put him in his room for a nap.
2:10 - He came out of his room and said he needed to potty. Realized he'd had a tee-tee accident. Sat on potty for 5 minutes but no more tee-tee. Washed hands. Back to room and he showed me the puddle soaked into the carpet where he had his accident. Soaked it up. Put him back to bed.
2:20 - He was asleep.
4:45 - He woke up dry! As soon as I saw him awake on the monitor, I took him straight to the potty. He tee-teed. Washed his hands. Got a potty treat.
5:35 - I thought he was trying to poop so I put him on the potty. We sat for 15 minutes. No poop or tee-tee. Washed hands.
6:45 - Had a tee-tee accident. Sat on potty and tee-teed again. Washed hands. Got potty treat. Put on new underwear.
7:40 - Had a tee-tee accident. Sat on potty and tee-teed again. Washed hands. Got potty treat. Put on new underwear.
8:10 - Bath. I'm sure he tee-teed in the tub.
8:50 - Had an accident. Sat on potty, tee-teed. Washed hands. Potty treat. New pair of underwear and pajamas.
9:10 - asleep in his underwear - NO diaper. We'll see how the night goes!

Things I've realized today:

1. We are going to need more soap.
2. He is not telling me he needs to tee-tee which was what I wanted to see after his nap. Therefore, I didn't put him on the potty, but instead waited for him to tell me he needed to go. Clearly, with three accidents this evening, he is not telling me. Something to work on for day 2.
3. Except the one small meltdown over no potty treat when he didn't use the restroom, he was SO good today and even took a good nap! So, focusing on going to the potty kept him from misbehaving.
4. At least 100 times today, I said the following "Atticus do you need to tee-tee? Do you need to poop?" And his usual response was "Attis don't have any poop" or "Attis don't have any tee-tee" or "Yay!" throwing his fists into the air when he would tee-tee on the potty.

All in all not a terrible day, but also not terribly successful. Read to start day 2!

Update on Atticus

So, after my long blog post about Atticus and figuring out how to be a good mom to him, we had a surprisingly great week! We went to the pumpkin patch and petting zoo at Farm Patch in Bryan, went to the children's museum, attended a playdate at the park, played well, pottied several times, and napped 2x out of 5 days. In the end, I realized that 1) he is ready to seriously potty train as he is telling me when he needs to go (although sometimes it means he has already gone); 2) naps may change from day to day. Sometimes, I think he is really tired and needs a nap, but other times I think he may be just fine staying up for the day and playing; and 3) I think I'm learning that he is pretty happy when it's our little family of four or even just me, Grace, and him during the day. I think he likes playdates and other children a lot (I mean - as soon as we are done with one, all he wants to talk about are the other kids!), but I also think he is cautious and slow to just jump up and join in the crowd. I think that is ok though. Although I really want him to have fun and play, I think I will just give him time to decide on his own when he is comfortable. For example, we had our friends, Mandee and Derek and their two little boy, Beck and Ben in town for the weekend. They arrived on Friday afternoon, but it took Atticus until Saturday afternoon to just play with Beck and laugh and play in his room and sometimes even share! So, I think it just took him time to warm up.

Anyways, he has had a couple fits already this week and is still learning boundaries, but I was glad last week was so fun and good!

In the meantime, he has begun including the following phrases in his daily conversations:

"That's enough Dace." when she is crying.
"Attis go get saw and fix Dace's bed" daily after Vic moved her bed down a level last week. He trots off to get his toy saw or flashlight or hammer.
Everything is "his" such as "Where my daddy?" or "My baby wake up!" or "see my yiyyul punkins" or "docta my boo-boo mommy".

Oh and for a quick little moment: Last week, I was getting dinner ready and both kids were in the playroom off of the kitchen and I hear music and look over and Atticus is playing his dog guitar and just dancing away. Then, he takes Grace's arms and starts making her dance too and she just laughs and giggles! They were playing with each other and he was actually being so gentle! They will have so much fun playing together one day!

Catchup!

A few bullet points to catch you all up:

• Grace has been adorable lately. We call the second picture her "model on a beach" pose.
  
   
   
• Grace is really trying hard to crawl. She gets on all fours and then flattens.

• We went to the Brazos Valley County Fair the weekend of baptism, but I forgot to put up any pictures. Atticus still talks about the "fet" and I'm really glad Ana got to feed some goats for the first time!
  
  
  
  

• I decorated our house for fall!
  

• Grace is taking most of her baths with Atticus now. Atticus likes having her in there most of the time, but doesn't' want to share his toys...even though there are about 45 in the tub!

•  GG, Molly, Grace, Atticus and I went to San Marcos for a weekend for the Creating Keepsakes Scrapbook Convention. We had plans to scrapbook all night long while the kids slept and take some classes and shop all day. This would have worked beautifully except that my kids didn't sleep hardly at all either night. Looking back, I'm not sure if Grace's teeth were bothering her or she just couldn't get into a deep sleep, but she was up every 45 minutes or so both nights and of course, woke Atticus. They were both pretty tired the last day though falling asleep while we finished our shopping. Atticus' favorite things were the "elebator" and the muffins at breakfast each morning at the Embassy Suites. I think he really just liked getting up over and over to walk to the food. It was a great trip, but I think next year, I'm leaving the kids at home. We did get a lot of shopping and some classes in though!

•  We just moved Grace's mattress down a level. I picked up her in this picture and stood her against the bed. While she can't get herself completely up to standing position by herself, she is almost there. How is she already to this point?

• We've been busy with more house repairs and vehicle repairs. I backed Vic's truck out of the driveway a couple weeks ago and hit the mirror on the side of the garage. I hate doing things like that!! I especially hated that moment because I was actually watching closely because I knew he was parked close to the side and I STILL hit it! That's $344 we will never get back. So. Mad. At. Myself. In addition to previous air conditioner repair, a/c condensation leak, drywall repair, and water pressure reducer replacement, Vic has also replaced some part to one of the toilets and also still has to clean or replace the sprayer on our kitchen sink. Goodness!
• I had a Stella and Dot jewelry party recently. It was a lot of fun, but nicest of all, the stylist, Sharon brought her 2 1/2 year old, Arleigh, to play with Atticus. Sharon and Vic played together when they were little kids and their parents are still good friends.

• I'm teaching 2-3 year old Sunday School now. There are only two regular kids in the class, including Atticus. But, we decided that they were too young for the 4-5 year old class, so I offered to teach. Today was the first day and our lesson was the parable of the Wedding Banquet. Well, last night I told Atticus that at Sunday School the next morning we were going to go to God's party and eat muffins, etc. This morning, he was awake at 7am and quietly, after realizing we were waking up, climbed into our bed and told us was ready for "dod's pawty to eat muvits". Clearly, waiting for this morning to get here was very exciting because he also didn't fall asleep until 10 pm last night!
• Atticus is loving time with Daddy right now. The past couple of weeks he just squeals when Vic gets home and is so happy to see him. He always loves to see Vic, but I think he is starting to really realize that he is with me all day long and that Vic is not there. So, this past Friday, he and Vic had a little boys night after dinner. I thought it was going to be a family night, but according to Atticus, it was for only him and Vic. I had promised him that after dinner that night, we would all go to the park together. So, after dinner and telling us he was "veddy go!", he gave Grace and I kisses and hugs and then told us "mama dace tay vight heah". He and Vic were headed to the park without us! Of course, when they came back, I heard about his night. He and Vic had gone to the park to play in the rocks with their shovels and toys, gone to get Daddy a haircut, and then gotten frozen yogurt at Spoons. Upon their return, he ran in to the house so excited to bring me a bowl of yogurt with strawberries. Then, he showed me his bowl filled with marshmallows, m&ms, gummy worms and a little bit of yogurt. He also has only wanted Vic to read to him or tell stories when Vic is home but he loves his daddy so much and his daddy is so creative and fun!
• Atticus is talking a lot more each and every day. A few of his current phrases that I love:
• "how does dis wuks?" when checking out something new.
• "happy hayoween!!"
• "mama yay down take yiyull nap" - he is always trying to get me to nap with him
• "move mama! dough!" when we are driving; he never wants me to stop the car although I explain to him that we have to stop at red lights and go on green lights. So, then he tells me to "dough mama deen yight!"
• "attis be nice" after I get onto him when he has done something he shouldn't.
• "wheh all duh people?" when we had to run up to the church a couple weekdays this week.
• "dace vake; attis make dace yaugh" each morning when he hears her in her room and he loves to go in and see her when she gets up.
• "siyyey guy" about random people or toys that he thinks are being silly.
• And, lastly, I am trying to learn how to be a good mom to Atticus as he goes through toddlerhood. As much as we change his schedule and tote him around and expect him to be good with every family gathering or event, he is flexible and goes with the flow and really is a good boy. And unless he is not getting his way and just can't take it, he doesn't do a lot of fit throwing. But, he is also testing lots of boundaries regarding hitting, kicking, and throwing things. He is funny about it; he rarely just walks up to hit or kick, but will run by you really fast with his hands out or he will sit on the floor and kick his legs back and forth until he gets close enough to touch you. He will usually look at me while he is doing it just to see what I will do. Sometimes I ignore it, but sometimes he does it to Grace and she is just still too little to put up with too much of that. When I do get onto him, he just growls at me which is so strange but I think it's his way of expressing himself? And, of course, we are always working on sharing during church or play dates. He also wants me to play with him all of the time. Now, I know that he will not want this forever and I want to play with him as much as possible. But, I also want him to learn to play on his own. Plus, when I am not playing with him, he tends to start the hitting, kicking, throwing as if he is very bored. So, then I'm getting onto him and he is in trouble and I'm thinking that if he would just go play for a little while until I can play again, he wouldn't be in trouble. He also is getting to that stage where I am wondering if he needs a nap. I LOVE naps because when they nap for a couple of hours, I can do things around the house. But, recently, he takes a long time to get tired enough for a nap or he will finally play in his room for awhile instead of napping after I've closed his door for his naptime. He also has so much energy! My goal each day is always to help him exert as much energy as possible in the mornings with park, playing, children's museum, activities, etc. so he will nap well. But, lately, I can't seem to wear him out. So, then if he does finally nap at 3:00, he wakes up groggy at 5 or later but then gets a burst of energy and wants to be up until 10:00. So, I may try the "no nap" schedule this week and see if we can get back to an 8:00 bedtime. Other than that, I am just trying to balance teaching him to be kind and letting him be a normal little boy who is wild and wants to play rough...while also deciding what works best for what moment for discipline - timeouts, spankings, nose in the corner, taking things away, etc. And don't get me wrong - we have wonderful days together. He is funny and methodical and loves to read and play and run and giggle. I really don't have complaints but I just want to get it right as the mama!

That is us in a nutshell for the last few weeks!